by Tommy Gimler
But why can’t I go out with Jimmy anymore, dad?
Outside of taking the series from Chicago over the weekend, which can be damn near as satisfying as a knob job from a girl eight years after she said no to going to prom with you, watching Brewers baseball lately has been painful. Since sweeping the Pirates in early June, the Brew Crew is a pig shit awful 18-23, allowing both the Cubs and Cardinals to pass them in the NL Central.
However, Brewers fans who have stuck with their beloved team on a nightly basis have been rewarded in another way. Yup, we’re talking about titty grabs. Here’s one from this weekend that probably resulted in one local father making a trip to the gun store.
Finally somebody with a double in a Brewers jersey tonight!!! #Brewers pic.twitter.com/j57VoELDoA
— James Moran (@Jiggs44) July 27, 2019
Of course, that yam grab came on the heels of this handful of boob that was seen by millions a few weeks ago when the Giants came to town.
So what gives? Is the drinking water in Milwaukee tainted with Molly? Did an atrocious spring in Wisconsin make sports fans in the “Land of Bull Shit and Beer Farts” so uber-horny that they can’t refrain from molesting each other in public?
Whatever it is, it’s giving Brewers fans a reason to stay tuned until the final pitch is thrown regardless of whether or not Jeremy Jeffress is serving up 500-foot bombs…
Wait, there’s more: People Still Think Running With Bulls Is A Good Idea
You have got to see this shit:
